It’s Friday the 13th. There’s going to be another one in exactly three months but guess what’s so special about today? It’s all about me! It’s my birthday! For the past 25 years, I grew up being excited about my birthday each year but today I feel different. I feel weird. I feel like I am in a dilemma about whether I should feel old or young. I seriously wasn’t expecting to be in this situation for my quarter century. I hope to find an answer to my question in the new chapter that has just opened in my life. Today’s topic will be all about me, so my dear readers, please bear with me until you can.
Before starting this blog, I used to read positive quotes once in a while and I’d be positive for a short time and then I’d get back to my confused thinking world. I don’t know for how long this had been going on with me but my thinking was just never straightforward. After I started this blog, a lot of confusion disappeared from my mind and I was finally able to see the bigger picture about my life. Things have definitely got better for me than where I was a decade ago or even a year ago. The word “magic” was never part of my dictionary but this year, I feel like some magic happened and since then, my life is getting back on track. I remember I used to complain a lot over little issues not only because I didn’t do much to change situations around me but rather because I grew up believing that it’s not right to keep anger inside of you. I’d only feel peaceful once I’d throw out my angry thoughts. However this year, I must say that I am proud of myself for not complaining that much. Everything will never be under my control so I realized that I should accept things that I cannot change and for the rest that can be changed; I should simply go ahead and do my best to change them.
Beside blogging, I’ve accomplished some great things which helped me discover the hidden strength I had inside of me. Nonetheless the true credit behind my little achievements goes to a lot of people who were and are part of my life this current year. In other words, I am talking about those who were with me on a daily basis. Without them, I wouldn’t have got this far. I learned this year that it’s not right to force people to make them stay in your life, so I happily let those who needed a break from me take their break. At the same time, I think I also needed that break so the equation is balanced. To my complete surprise, I reunited with some old acquaintances that I thought I would never get to see again. I was very happy to see them because they either made me change my way of looking at things for the better or they showed me a direction to start a new life. Apart from them, I even saw my coworkers, who are not just coworkers anymore but mean a lot more to me, bringing the best out of me by pushing me to new experiences whether it was a personal or professional one. I always enjoy being nice to others because I myself like to be treated nicely but here I feel like I was rewarded with more than I even gave.
There’s a wonderful saying by Lao Tzu that I want to share with you: “being deeply loved gives you strength; loving deeply gives you courage.” This is what I recently experienced and the feeling was indeed beautiful. When you meet people, you never know when you touch their heart and this was my case too. I didn’t know that I was special to many until they came to me with “There’s a better path waiting ahead of you.” I think I was so busy in my daily life and I had reached my comfort level that I just didn’t bother stepping out of my comfort zone until many pushed me to take time to think about myself. Only then I realized that just like I don’t always show my love to people, there are many who love me as well even if they don’t always show it. I’ll repeat this again but maybe I just never opened my eyes to see who truly cared about me and when I did, it felt like magic one more time. Back to the quote I shared with you, I think it’s because of people who love me and care for me that I was never able to give up on life, despite how negative things seemed in my life. It’s just amazing! As for me, you could have guessed it by now, I get attached to my world and since people were made to be respected and cared, I don’t see why I wouldn’t love them. Furthermore, loving people has taught me that I have gathered a lot of courage to fight any struggle that may come on my way. They believe so much in me that even if I wanted to give up, I wouldn’t give up for their sake. Whoever said your worth increases with time was right and I am happy that I got to experience that at this stage of life.
Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together. It’s such a simple statement and yet it took me several years to understand it and believe in it. Nothing lasts forever. Everything is relative. People who were once so close to us turn into distanced friends and those who didn’t mean a lot to us in the past become a big part of our present. Maybe life was always like that and I just opened my eyes now but whatever it is, now I know everything happens for the better. It feels like I am seeing the calm after the storm. One single tragedy changed my life almost a decade ago and now that I look back at the many little good changes that happened as years passed by, I feel like I have reached the top of a mountain called “Happiness”. I am also happy that those who caused me grief are no longer part of my life and those who are with me today are the ones who really matter. To be honest, my success today would mean nothing if I couldn’t share the happiness I get from it with those who’ve given me hope or have supported me.
I am truly excited for the new chapter that has started for me and I am mostly happy that a lot of confusion has been cleared from my mind. In brief, “When something bad happens, you have three choices. You can either let it define you, let it destroy you or you can let it strengthen you.” I kept saying that bad experiences define me but the truth deep down was that those experiences had been strengthening me. The picture is finally clear to me today and I think my new life starts from there...